"Cash for Coupons Act" Stimulates And Saves
With deficits as far as the eye can see and our national debt rising to levels that would make Greece blush congress has finally taken meaningful steps to address our nations financial problems. President Obama announced today a new initiative called, "SAVE our future" which passed with overwhelming bipartisan support. In the coming weeks and months government will be phasing in a new payment program for entitlements. On Welfare? Social Security? Medicare, or Medicaid? Half of your hard given money will now come in the form of coupons. For Welfare the administration has teamed up with Gerber, Pampers, and Budweiser to help save money where it counts. Those on Social Security will have their checks subsidized with coupons for Luby's, Depends, and discounts to Donny Osmond. If you need Medicare or Medicaid you are in luck because Marlboro and Advil are coming to the rescue.
With this new program also comes the new "Cash for Coupons Act" which allows savvy investors bold new opportunities with government bonds looking grim in the near future. These coupons are available for anywhere between $7.00 and $10.00 a share, a wise investment if you enjoy Applebee's and don't mind having to buy another meal of equal or lesser value. If you get the steak and shrimp combo you can create or save some cold hard cash.
Proponents of the change assure us that it will stimulate the economy by forcing people to go out and spend to receive their full benefits. Naysayers claim it is cruel and unusual for the government to hold back well deserved money it doesn't have. Proponents claim that having coupons put directly into the hands of the people will save them time and effort they would otherwise have to spend cutting out coupons while giving them more time to look for jobs that don't exist.
We promise to follow this new legislation closely as we approach the midterm elections but as for now it appears clear that both parties have very open and transparent non-existent plans to get the economy on track.
Tyson Bam
July 30th, 2010
